REVIEWED BY WALTER ALBERT:         


IF I HAD A MILLION. Paramount, 1932. Gary Cooper, Charles Laughton, George Raft, W. C. Fields, Jack Oakie, and 41 featured players. Screenplay by various hands, based on the novel Windfall by Robert D. Andrews. Directed by Ernst Lubitsch, Norman Taurog, Stephen Roberts, Norman McLeod, James Cruze, William A. Seiter, and H. Bruce Humberstone. Shown at Cinevent 41, Columbus OH, May 2009.

IF I HAD A MILLION

    The premise of this eight-part anthology film is that wealthy John Glidden (Richard Bennett), close to death, dissatisfied with his life and wanting to do some good before he dies, decides to give his fortune away in the form of million dollar checks to strangers.

    The film seems to include every name actor on the Paramount lot at the time, but the sequence that is best known is “Road Hogs,” directed by Norman McLeod. It features W. C. Fields and Alison Skipworth as former, down-on-their-Iuck vaudevillians who, with the check that Emily La Rue (Skipworth) receives, buy the car of their dreams.

    When the car is demolished by a road hog, the pair buy a fleet of cars and, followed by their new purchases, each with its own driver, they take the lead in an afternoon’s drive during which they demolish the car of every road hog who tries to cross their path, until, they drive off triumphantly in the last undamaged car.

    The narrative spectrum includes a forger trying, without success, to cash his check, a death-row prisoner relieved to have a fortune to leave to his wife, and, in the shortest and most pointed of the stories, directed by Ernst Lubitsch, a lowly clerk (Charles Laughton) who finds the perfect way to pay back his employer for years of indignities inflicted upon him.

    As might be expected, the film is uneven, but it’s never less than entertaining, and at its best, a wonderful display of the writing, directing and acting talent available at Paramount in the early 1930s.

IF I HAD A MILLION