Fri 6 Nov 2015
Reviewed by Dan Stumpf: THE NEANDERTHAL MAN (1953).
Posted by Steve under Horror movies , Reviews[14] Comments
by DAN STUMPF on:
THE NEANDERTHAL MAN. United Artists, 1953. Robert Shayne, Joyce Terry, Richard Crane, Beverly Garland. Written by Aubrey Wisberg and Jack Pollexfen. Directed by E. A. Dupont.
It would be easy to pick at this shabby film for the confused story, wooden acting and choppy continuity — I mean how tacky is it when the movie credits misspell the name of the top-billed actor? And as long as we’re carping, there’s the scene where Beverly Garland walks into the background and is replaced by another actress, or the muddled montage where a sabre-tooth tiger attacks a car, intercut with footage of a bobcat and something hitting the windshield that looks like a suction-cup Garfield. And don’t let’s forget the stiff and unconvincing rubber mask that’s supposed to be a primitive beast-face.
Robert Shayne is remembered these days as Inspector Henderson on The Adventures of Superman but he did his share of Mad Doctoring in things like Face of Marble and The Indestructible Man. Here he gets to pull out a few stops and rave in the approved Lugosi style as a scientist (in what field I’m not exactly sure, and I suspect the writers weren’t either) who believes Neanderthal Man was our intellectual equal — a motif in some recent TV Commercials — and has developed a serum that will regress stuff.
As the film opens, he has used this on a house cat and a housekeeper, and when he tries it on himself he turns into the frozen-faced boogeyman of the title, lumbering amok about the countryside trying to make things lively.
The first disturbing element comes when he carries off a local gal and (it’s pretty clearly implied) brutally rapes her. But later on, after he abducts a waitress and they spend the night in a cave, she comes out in the morning and begs the surrounding posse to spare his life. Which makes one wonder just what went on, but I suspect that here again the writers had no idea.
For me though, the most unsettling part came earlier, in the standard scene where Shayne is being scoffed at by his scientist-peers after showing them a display that “demonstrates†how Neanderthal was more advanced than Cro-Magnon, and when they ask him for proof, he calls them stupid.
A silly scene, poorly written, but something about the temper of our times made it resonate with me. There are people coming on national TV these days who publicly boast that they can’t understand Evolution and want us to elect them President.
There are others who call us stupid if we ask for proof of what they say — as I sat watching the Mad Doctor spouting the same clichés about being misunderstood, I almost expected him to blame the Liberal Media.
And it got me to wondering if some of the public figures of these days maybe watched too many late-late shows. Or has public discourse moved to the level of a cheesy old horror flick? Which may be the scariest thing we’ll see this Halloween.
Pleasant dreams, children…..
November 7th, 2015 at 12:24 am
Not much of a review. Beverly Garland, the Meryl Streep of B-movies, seemed to try to keep the cheesecake to a minimum this early in her career. She may have refused the swimsuit scene and had them use a double. She did that in a short where, as a hitchiker, she strips to her undies, replaced in the last scenes.
November 7th, 2015 at 6:46 am
E.A. Dupont was a German director who worked all over the world. He’s most admired for his 1920’s films.
He’s the subject of the book “E.A. Dupont and His Contribution to British Film” (2010) by Paul Matthew St. Pierre.
I’ve only seen two of his best-known silents: Varieté and Piccadilly.
I enjoyed the review.
November 7th, 2015 at 7:01 am
A movie review should, by definition, discuss the film, not use it for a forced, silly political parallel. That’s bush league. You should pardon the pun.
November 7th, 2015 at 12:57 pm
Bill, Dan didn’t call it a review. He noted in his title “Some Morbid Refections” which is what he does using the film as a starting point.
Not all film criticism is limited to the “review.” There are essays, satires and a variety other of forms.
November 7th, 2015 at 2:09 pm
A 1950s version of those Mad Doctor movies that Bela Lugosi made for Monogram, without being as enjoyably bad as they are.
November 7th, 2015 at 2:37 pm
Michael, thanks for the explanation of the different modes of criticism. May I refer to you the actual header – the one you click on to get here. Had it said “Dan’s analysis of the current political medis situation”, I would’ve passed it by. And before you make the next expected lecture, I’m a leftie, so it’s not the content to which I object, but rather his ham-handed way of working it in. By putting it under “review”, he’s as dishonest as the politcos he’s criticizing.
November 7th, 2015 at 3:25 pm
Bill
If it matters, I put the header on, not Dan. I think it’s a review of the movie, and a good one. If you don’t agree, the person you should blame is me.
Steve
November 7th, 2015 at 3:59 pm
Speaking for myself (a habit of mine) I deny all responsibility (another habit) and blame Steve too.
November 7th, 2015 at 5:52 pm
The part of the movie I enjoyed the most was a certain “hair-raising” scene that got a guffaw out of me.
November 7th, 2015 at 7:19 pm
Steve,
You should be ashamed of yourself getting Dan into trouble like that.
It’s hard to take a film very seriously with Inspector Henderson as the lead. How low was your budget …
My own political take on this film is that those Neanderthals should stop attacking Cro Magnon with their low brow content. They’ve been upset ever since CLAN OF THE CAVE BEAR tanked at the boxoffice. The record of Neanderthal movies failing at the boxoffice is pretty bad leading me to suspect there is a conspiracy among critics to silence this small but creative force in the industry.
Ah well, we always have the brilliant films EGAHH and that one with Brendan Fraser and Pauly Shore … no, wait, he was Cro Magnon, so it was a conspiracy …
November 7th, 2015 at 8:21 pm
My favorite prehistoric man in the movies is the one played by Frank Moran (replacing George Zucco(!) in the role) in 1944’s RETURN OF THE APE MAN, one of the Monogram efforts with Lugosi I previously mentioned.
November 8th, 2015 at 7:08 am
Hey, I liked Brendan Fraser in the comedy “Encino Man”!
November 11th, 2015 at 7:36 pm
Dan accurately described the haphazard feel of a lot of horror flicks from this period. I just watched one that’s mentioned in the comments, EEGAH, and it’s right up there with this classic. The scariest part is that I saw THE NEANDERTHAL MAN as a kid, at a Saturday matinee, and thought it was terrific.
September 3rd, 2017 at 5:55 pm
Dupont and Robert Shayne were both being severely blacklisted when they did Neanderthal Man.