NO PLACE FOR A LADY. Columbia Pictures, 1943. William Gargan, Margaret Lindsay, Phyllis Brooks, Dick Purcell, Jerome Cowan, Edward Norris, Thomas Jackson. Screenwriter: Eric Taylor. Director: James P. Hogan.

   It’s worth pointing out, I’m sure, that the two leading stars of No Place for a Lady, William Gargan and Margaret Lindsay, had just finished appearing in the last three of seven early 1940s Ellery Queen movies – playing EQ himself and Nikki Porter, respectively. (Lindsay was actually in all seven. It was Ralph Bellamy who portrayed the master detective in the first four.)

   And digressing a little more before going any further, I can’t imagine either Bellamy or Gargan as the erudite Mr. Queen, but Hollywood license went a whole lot farther then than it does now.

   Since Eric Taylor was involved in the writing of all seven EQ films, and director James Hogan did the last six, when it came time for them to do No Place for a Lady, it’s natural, I think, to wonder if they simply reworked a leftover Ellery Queen script, but I don’t think so. If they did, it was one heck of a rewrite.

   William Gargan plays a high-powered PI named Jess Arno in this one, while Margaret Lindsay is a real estate agent June Terry, and his fiancée, She’s also the jealous type, which is important, and so is the fact that she’s a real estate agent.

   Egged on by a close reporter friend named Rand Brooke (Dick Purcell), who’d like to get closer, Terry stages a fake murder in a seashore cottage she has for rent, hoping to get Arno in trouble when he leaves his latest client there, a beautiful blonde (Phyllis Brook) whom he’s just gotten off on a murder rap.

   Unknown to everyone involved, a rat named Eddie Moore (Jerome Cowan) has already left his own very real murder victim there, a casualty of a scam involving a fire and hijacked tires.

   Which leads to an entire movie’s worth of strange coincidences, misunderstandings, missing bodies, false leads and blaring air raid alerts, complete with the dumbest pair of shoreside cops you will ever hope to meet – or not. The fact that Eddie Moore is also a nightclub singer means that a few minutes can be taken up with a song or two.

   Don’t expect any detective work to be done in this movie, and you’ll be all right. I imagine that in the movie theaters in 1943, the laughs came loud and often, but in all honesty, that wasn’t what I was watching for.

   I’m always happy to have a copy of any PI movie that comes along, but while the movie isn’t actually bad, neither is it very good. In spite of its magnificent pedigree, No Place for a Lady is more disappointment than not.